[ what kida will hear for the first few seconds is nothing but white noise — muffled static and rustling as someone ok the other side seems to reconsider her choices...
[When he checks his phone and finds the message, he quickly calls her back, urging her to pick up. The last thing Masaomi is going to do is forget something a girl's told him.]
she almost laughs, really. the voice in her head sounds nothing at all like the kida she knows — snide, sarcastic, malicious, and cutting and in the privacy of her boarded up room she can feel it — a fear.
a fear of that tone, a fear of his words, a fear of him. sitting here, curled up and staring at the image of his face on her phone, unaware of the camera rolling thanks to clumsy fingers and a mind that can only focus on the fact that he would, wouldn't he, maybe not necessarily say it, but he'd think it, they'd all think it, and she has to agree. why her. it should never be her.
and he'll realize that soon. if he hasn't already. if his attentions aren't already just a thing to pass the time, and ciel was right, her reactions are nothing more than a source of amusement.
[Sometimes the world does everything it can to destroy you. It chews you up and spits you out into slobbery, misshapen pieces that will never fit together again. And sometimes one person can say the only two words you need to hear the day after a near suicide.
Several quiet but shaky breaths later, Masaomi answers simply:] Okay.
Masaomi actually lets it ring several times, deciding whether or not he should pick up. He's not in any mood for it, but she's the one calling him, and she might need something. Finally, he answers. He doesn't say anything though, letting her do the talking if she's so impatient.]
[ Eighteen days. That’s how long it’s been since they’ve spoken. Seventeen days since she failed to meet him outside the apartments, like she promised.
Sixteen days since she realized, again, how utterly horrible she was.
Saika had not been helping, but Anri had not expected it to. Her thoughts had been too weighty for the spirit to contend with, forever goading Anri toward an ideal of love she can’t fill. The way they fail to understand one another is the only thing that gets her from one day to the next, but at times it feels like she’s carrying a petulant child in her soul and not an ancient demonic spirit. She had fallen asleep to whispers and woken up to screams, clutching at her sheets tight enough to draw holes.
On the eighteenth day, it gets to be too much. She needs loudness to draw her out of her thoughts, excitement and frivolity to protect her from the darker moments. It may not drive her mad with love, but it could drive her mad with madness.
She’s always been selfish, parasite, but Sonohara Anri isn’t sure when she started being weak too.
She sits with her phone for nearly an hour before she has the courage to make the call. ]
K—
[ She hangs up abruptly a moment later, leaving a single syllable hanging in the air and, more helpfully, in his voicemail. ]
[It's amazing how time can pass so slowly and so quickly at the same time. Masaomi doesn't know how long it's been, has stopped counting days since anything after he died, but he knows it's been too long. It's felt like too long. It's felt that way for too long.
He's spent several days, off and on, questioning his own eyes and ears. She'd seemed happy, at least a little, when he'd promised to stick with her. But then the same thing had happened with Izumo, hadn't it? It's different than his self-imposed separation from Saki. Rather than a sharp rippling of the surface, leaving him to face his own distorted cowardice, it aches dully in his core, a heavy reminder.
This is what happens when he doesn't run first.
But he gets by, dipping rocks in sugar and calling it candy. Izumo's yelling at him again. Al is as generous as ever. Dave doesn't make sense, and that's the joke. He's even rooming with two girls now.
So why is that single sound he's just heard in his voicemail so utterly devastating? His heart leaps into his throat, and he has to swallow it fast because there are too many people in his apartment. Suddenly, it's all too small. The walls are closing in, and he needs air.
The second time he listens to Anri's voicemail, he's alone in a back alley, leaning against a wall. Masaomi has always agonized over decisions, but this one feels so baseless, he doesn't know where to start. Does she want him to reply or not? Is dialing his number her true feelings, or is hanging up? Anri wouldn't play games with him, so where is this coming from? Does she really hate him now? Or...?
He doesn't want to consider the "or," doesn't want to get his hopes up just so they can be dashed again.
It's all too serious, too real, for him. So in the end, he decides to make it a kind of game. That way... That way, if she doesn't reply, he's only lost a silly game.
After thinking far too long, he too leaves just the one syllable.]
this one, she needs to see personally, because there's much more to talk about here than some stupid vampire trying to get her kicks in.
hesitantly, izumo hovers by the doorway, wondering just what she means to do, but... in the end, she just pushes forward, lifting a hand to knock. once. ]
[Masaomi opens the door while still laughing at something one of his roommates must have said, neck craned as he shouts a haughty "stuff it!" When he turns around and sees Izumo standing in front of him, however, he quickly sobers. His gaze wanders back into the room once more before he steps into the hall and shuts the apartment door behind him.
Izumo receives a small smile for her efforts, worn out and defeated. But for once, he doesn't try to lead the coming conversation to a safe topic before she can even start it.]
But okay, there's no time to linger on that. She's here with a purpose, after all. Even if it's sort of late, and even if she's already exhausted every single other possible resource (read: all the shirtless men in her apartment) first - but she just didn't want to ask him right away. She isn't sure if she can call it avoiding per se, but she just didn't want to face him that quickly again after everything. But she has no choice by now. It's why she doesn't bother with any greeting or pleasantries and instead continues right to the subject. ]
Do you know where Sonohara-san is?
[ She doubts he knows, but she has to try. She's already tried everything else, after all. So that's the only message she leaves. ]
He looks down at his phone after listening to the message and almost wants to laugh. Of course, she's been searching too. And, of course, she hasn't found anything either. He lets her question wash over him for several minutes before he calls back, deceptively confident.]
[ no tokens in hand to hide behind this time. this time, it's just izumo, leaning against the wall beside the doorless threshold that is apartment #5.005. she has something to say, kida, and as much as she'd like to simply drop a voicemail and be done with it... she knows she owes him a lot more than that. ]
[When Masaomi encroaches upon the fifth floor, it's with a plastic bag of assorted cans and some jerky. He stops when he sees who's waiting at his apartment, his expression perhaps just slightly too flat for the occasion. That, though, may be related to the bags beneath his eyes.]
Oh? Did the tsun princess get lost in castle dere?
When I say I always have time for a cute girl, I mean it! [He offers her the same sorts of ridiculous sayings he would have any other day, but there's something strained and tight in his tone.] What's up?
[ Voice mail isn't a real thing in Haven, but then neither is death. There are a lot of not-real things here. Writing is one of them, too... Usually. But not in this case.
In other words, Cecil is not going to keep it short. Sorry. ]
Hello, Masaomi Kida. I found something of yours I'd like to return to you. In the future, you might want to be more careful about how you discard your trash next time. You don't want the wrong type of person picking it up.
Even though Masaomi hears the message, he doesn't answer right away. He sits on it, letting ten, twenty, thirty minutes go by as he gets carried away with other things. Other things that only fuel his nerves. But what is he supposed to say?
Finally, he picks up the phone. Off in a corner where no one can hear (no one normal, no one human), he finally decides to get it over with. After everything he's done the past few days, dealing with a little blackmail should be easy.
It's not.
Masaomi takes a deep breath.]
You found it? Seriously?! The letter, right? I've been looking all over for it! Guess that's what happens when you're stuck with hand-me-down jeans, holes in the pockets.
Of all the people to find it though... Guess I'm a lucky guy.
[This was a call that took forever for him to decide to make. Given the severity of his actions against the poor teenager, he wouldn't be surprised if the other hated him forever.
A part of him whispered that it served the teenager right for being an employee of Yao and a traitor, but he clamped down on that and pushed it to the back of his mind. As far as he knew, Kida Masaomi had not done anything to warrant the kind of treatment Axl gave him a few weeks back.]
Hey. This is... Axl. The guy who tried to kill you a few weeks back. I just... wanted to say I'm sorry for my behaviour then. You might be an employee, but that doesn't excuse what I did to you. I'd get it if you hate my guts now and never wanna see me again. Yeah, that would be the normal response, wouldn't it?
[Masaomi doesn't respond right away. He doesn't even know Axl enough to hate him, but he sure as hell wants to hate him. He wants to shoot the guy with his own gun a few times, give him a taste of his own medicine. But he has a feeling that won't make him feel any better. Masaomi has more important things to think about now. He has to make it up to Mikado for scaring him like that. So...]
I won't forgive you unless you do something for me first.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
( voicemail )
and then— ]
—stupid. Forget it.
[ and then a click, end. ]
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there is no note. ]
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( backdated to 12/19 → video )
she almost laughs, really. the voice in her head sounds nothing at all like the kida she knows — snide, sarcastic, malicious, and cutting and in the privacy of her boarded up room she can feel it — a fear.
a fear of that tone, a fear of his words, a fear of him. sitting here, curled up and staring at the image of his face on her phone, unaware of the camera rolling thanks to clumsy fingers and a mind that can only focus on the fact that he would, wouldn't he, maybe not necessarily say it, but he'd think it, they'd all think it, and she has to agree. why her. it should never be her.
and he'll realize that soon. if he hasn't already. if his attentions aren't already just a thing to pass the time, and ciel was right, her reactions are nothing more than a source of amusement.
she really does laugh this time.
good. i only ever want to be alone, she thinks. ]
Don't leave, [ she croaks. ]
( video )
Several quiet but shaky breaths later, Masaomi answers simply:] Okay.
( video )
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( voice; 02/20 )
anyway whatever answer your phone you can probably feel her impatience in these rings. ]
( voice; 02/20 )
Masaomi actually lets it ring several times, deciding whether or not he should pick up. He's not in any mood for it, but she's the one calling him, and she might need something. Finally, he answers. He doesn't say anything though, letting her do the talking if she's so impatient.]
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( action ) 2/2
ᴠᴏɪᴄᴇᴍᴀɪʟ.
Sixteen days since she realized, again, how utterly horrible she was.
Saika had not been helping, but Anri had not expected it to. Her thoughts had been too weighty for the spirit to contend with, forever goading Anri toward an ideal of love she can’t fill. The way they fail to understand one another is the only thing that gets her from one day to the next, but at times it feels like she’s carrying a petulant child in her soul and not an ancient demonic spirit. She had fallen asleep to whispers and woken up to screams, clutching at her sheets tight enough to draw holes.
On the eighteenth day, it gets to be too much. She needs loudness to draw her out of her thoughts, excitement and frivolity to protect her from the darker moments. It may not drive her mad with love, but it could drive her mad with madness.
She’s always been selfish, parasite, but Sonohara Anri isn’t sure when she started being weak too.
She sits with her phone for nearly an hour before she has the courage to make the call. ]
K—
[ She hangs up abruptly a moment later, leaving a single syllable hanging in the air and, more helpfully, in his voicemail. ]
ᴠᴏɪᴄᴇᴍᴀɪʟ.
He's spent several days, off and on, questioning his own eyes and ears. She'd seemed happy, at least a little, when he'd promised to stick with her. But then the same thing had happened with Izumo, hadn't it? It's different than his self-imposed separation from Saki. Rather than a sharp rippling of the surface, leaving him to face his own distorted cowardice, it aches dully in his core, a heavy reminder.
This is what happens when he doesn't run first.
But he gets by, dipping rocks in sugar and calling it candy. Izumo's yelling at him again. Al is as generous as ever. Dave doesn't make sense, and that's the joke. He's even rooming with two girls now.
So why is that single sound he's just heard in his voicemail so utterly devastating? His heart leaps into his throat, and he has to swallow it fast because there are too many people in his apartment. Suddenly, it's all too small. The walls are closing in, and he needs air.
The second time he listens to Anri's voicemail, he's alone in a back alley, leaning against a wall. Masaomi has always agonized over decisions, but this one feels so baseless, he doesn't know where to start. Does she want him to reply or not? Is dialing his number her true feelings, or is hanging up? Anri wouldn't play games with him, so where is this coming from? Does she really hate him now? Or...?
He doesn't want to consider the "or," doesn't want to get his hopes up just so they can be dashed again.
It's all too serious, too real, for him. So in the end, he decides to make it a kind of game. That way... That way, if she doesn't reply, he's only lost a silly game.
After thinking far too long, he too leaves just the one syllable.]
Ah.
[For Anri.]
ᴠᴏɪᴄᴇᴍᴀɪʟ.
ᴠᴏɪᴄᴇᴍᴀɪʟ.
( action; backdated to the 20th )
this one, she needs to see personally, because there's much more to talk about here than some stupid vampire trying to get her kicks in.
hesitantly, izumo hovers by the doorway, wondering just what she means to do, but... in the end, she just pushes forward, lifting a hand to knock. once. ]
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Izumo receives a small smile for her efforts, worn out and defeated. But for once, he doesn't try to lead the coming conversation to a safe topic before she can even start it.]
Hey.
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voicemail;
But okay, there's no time to linger on that. She's here with a purpose, after all. Even if it's sort of late, and even if she's already exhausted every single other possible resource (read: all the
shirtlessmen in her apartment) first - but she just didn't want to ask him right away. She isn't sure if she can call it avoiding per se, but she just didn't want to face him that quickly again after everything. But she has no choice by now. It's why she doesn't bother with any greeting or pleasantries and instead continues right to the subject. ]Do you know where Sonohara-san is?
[ She doubts he knows, but she has to try. She's already tried everything else, after all. So that's the only message she leaves. ]
voicemail;
He looks down at his phone after listening to the message and almost wants to laugh. Of course, she's been searching too. And, of course, she hasn't found anything either. He lets her question wash over him for several minutes before he calls back, deceptively confident.]
If she's still here, she's playing hard to get.
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( action; a day or two after the loyalty event; #5.005 )
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Oh? Did the tsun princess get lost in castle dere?
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( voice; after the last big quake )
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audio; post-Morgan abduction
PLEASE PICK UP. ]
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[ audio ]
In other words, Cecil is not going to keep it short. Sorry. ]
Hello, Masaomi Kida. I found something of yours I'd like to return to you. In the future, you might want to be more careful about how you discard your trash next time. You don't want the wrong type of person picking it up.
[ Like this type of person, for example. ]
no subject
Even though Masaomi hears the message, he doesn't answer right away. He sits on it, letting ten, twenty, thirty minutes go by as he gets carried away with other things. Other things that only fuel his nerves. But what is he supposed to say?
Finally, he picks up the phone. Off in a corner where no one can hear (no one normal, no one human), he finally decides to get it over with. After everything he's done the past few days, dealing with a little blackmail should be easy.
It's not.
Masaomi takes a deep breath.]
You found it? Seriously?! The letter, right? I've been looking all over for it! Guess that's what happens when you're stuck with hand-me-down jeans, holes in the pockets.
Of all the people to find it though... Guess I'm a lucky guy.
[Ha. Haha. Ha.]
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audio;
A part of him whispered that it served the teenager right for being an employee of Yao and a traitor, but he clamped down on that and pushed it to the back of his mind. As far as he knew, Kida Masaomi had not done anything to warrant the kind of treatment Axl gave him a few weeks back.]
Hey. This is... Axl. The guy who tried to kill you a few weeks back. I just... wanted to say I'm sorry for my behaviour then. You might be an employee, but that doesn't excuse what I did to you. I'd get it if you hate my guts now and never wanna see me again. Yeah, that would be the normal response, wouldn't it?
...I'm sorry.
[He ends the call shortly after.]
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I won't forgive you unless you do something for me first.
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